Memoirs of a Lost Childhood Love…

03:25am
10/23/07

Everybody has this one special person at one point in our life. Be it early on or in later years of our life. This is however, different from the special part that a true love occupies. I have this encounter…silly and childish memory from way back then…
I remembered this boy from my past when out of the blue I dreamed of him one rainy Thursday morning, this October. It dawned on me that I still hadn’t completely forgotten him, that he isn’t yet erased on my system. That the thought of him and everything about him had just been dormant for so long, laid there idle waiting to be stirred up. And I’m not quite sure what really stirred my brain up for it to resurface again…I hadn’t think of him for God knows how long (about 12 years)…And I remember him…
I remembered him, too well. How could one forget the popular person, he guy who’s most eligible and famous in our school way back then? How could one forget the most handsome boy in our school? Girls swoon by him every now and then. One of the most dashing in high school, a real cutie…How could one not notice the mayor’s son? He’s too cute, too neat and too smart to ignore. On the contrary, he’s also the most annoying person I’ve ever met. He’s got this weird habit of ticking me off. At one point, it occurs to me that he might not really be happy if he hadn’t had the chance to irritate me in a day. He’s way too ‘makulit’ at times and he’s sort of ‘suplado pa’. He’s also a rich kid and it’s a plain guess for me that it had to be the reason why he at times, ticks others off or was it just me? I’m just a plain, timid and ordinary nobody in school who seldom topped or excelled in the class.
Maybe he still knew me. Somewhere in my vague memory, he used to be my ‘ka-pair’ or was it just a member in a native dance ‘Kalapati’. A folkdance taught to us by Madam Caring in kindergarten. And he had been my lil secret crush since then. ‘Hala’, too young to adore. I could recall in Grade 1, Madam Paz Pajarillo would scold him and Raymund because they wouldn’t attend classes just to play ‘sipa’ at the back of our classroom with lots of ‘lastiko’ whom she warned to broil and let them eat…Hehehe. I used to sit beside him at one point in the second row (row 2…grade 1 blues) and he kept on annoying me until the next grading period where I’m grateful to be transferred in row 1 and he’s not my seatmate anymore. In the second grade, I don’t remember much of him except on the time when he laughed at me and teased me because I made ‘kalabasa’ dancing Oh La La onstage during one program. And, grrrr…I hate him then.
In Grade 3, I used to enjoy attending the nightly ‘Aurora’ on the next street, the San Roque Street. The assembly point was the chapel in front of their house and my classmate-friend’s aunt’s house. That’s Ayla Guinto, whom I fondly call ‘Lingkay’ my front door neighbor and ‘kababata’ which was also his distant cousin. We would go there right after supper just for the fun of it and for the foods right after (you know, the jacobina, kutipyo, kwati and boto ni Matong’). Then I would strain my neck long enough and stretch my legs craning just so I would see if he had ever gone out of their house to their gate to watch the ‘Aurora’. He then, would mock me the following morning in school for attending it. He would also tease another lowly classmate (just like me), Nimfa Legazpi for always wearing one and the same printed polo button-down several times a week, while she was cleaning our classroom CR.
In Grade 4, he had been my classmate and to no avail, again my seatmate on Madam Balon’s Math class. He would poke a pencil on my ear, annoy me by calling me names like ‘small friend’ or ‘little girl’ or ‘small frog’ just because I’m the smallest kid in our class. He used to say ‘ayayating’ to me, during lessons just so I would be annoyed to near tears already. I don’t even know whatever that means. Sometimes, his younger sister would tease him whenever they pass in front of our house on their way to the church by saying ‘sus, sinusundan mo lang yung legs ni small friend’…and what does that suppose to mean? I don’t wanna assume the impossible. His sister, I like her because she’s better than him and quite nicer than him. I got to know her in YFC gathering.
In Grade 5, lots of girls in our class and on other sections have a crush on him. I estimated maybe about 70% of the girls swoon on him and I didn’t even tried showing admirations because I’m one of them…since kindergarten. My ‘tropa’ knows about this. I’m quite shy about this, though since I’m not the ‘sikat’ one in school. Until Grade six, he’s still the inspiration I had and I’m grateful that he doesn’t even know about it. He’s fine to me until high school, when I discovered that I could be attracted to other guys, too. Just like Jaiv, Mb, Rj, Bo, Rc, Rp, Dp and Sm. A commonly simple and childish admiration for girl of our age. But he’s still there, within me. A part of me still wished for him to accept me for who I am. Hope for him to be close to me and be my friend. I still blush whenever he stood beside me, whenever he would casually speak to me. It’s so weird, but that’s how his impact on me was.
We graduated in high school and then I went to Bicol University to study political science…and him, I heard he went to MAPUA and now became a Civil Engineer as my source told to me. The last time I saw him was in 2nd year college, semestral vacation. We’re at the public cemetery, November 1 and we’re a group of classmates reunited again and having fun chatting away and filling the years that’s lost. I remembered how good he looked with his trademark ‘japorms’ – plain white Hanes shirt, light blue Levis 501 and his midnight blue Swatch topsider. My, he’s a cross between Richard Gomez and the now current (2007) model of Avon – Spirit Aqua perfume. A girl could really melt.
This made me rethink why I have never heard of him having or known anyone being his lucky girlfriend… We’ll except that he once dated Liza Labrador and also had been rumored to have a crush yata on Rosalia Rosalinas. Both girls are very attractive and cool in school. Other than that, nada. He’s too choosy. The last time I talked to him was in 2003. I’m dialing somebody’s # and I got him instead, due to misdialing. We then had quite some talk but I have never admitted what I had felt for him before and how I think of him except for the fact that he had been my crush in kindergarten. He even doubted me that I had intentionally dialed his number, he’s annoying me again just like before and the talk stretched more than an hour.
At one point in my life, I still have hopes to see him and talk to him in person whenever I had my chance in every vacation I take (which is very few) in Vinzons. Maybe because of curiosity, I wonder if he ever had a girlfriend or if he was ever married, or maybe to really confirm and sort myself out because of my confused feelings due to the resurfacing of his existence inside my mind, which I don’t even know why. Or maybe to have a closure on this saga that I consider as one of my dilemmas right now.
I may have a turbulent rollercoaster relationship right now, with the father of my three lil girls but…I don’t know why he’s continuously resurfacing in my mind from time to time when he means nothing to me anymore and the truth is I do love my live-in partner for 8 years, he’s the father of my children I love him so much, much more than I love myself. What about this person from the past? There’s a part of me who secretly hoped that he’s still eligible. Remembering him is a bittersweet memory unfolding. He had been my lost childhood love… I don’t know about him. I wouldn’t say a name but I wish he would read this, he’ll know it if he do…and one more thing, I guess he’ll know who I am, too.

10 Reasons to Hop to It

10 Reasons to Hop to It and Jump Rope

Jumping rope. Some of us haven't done it since schoolyard days.

But here are the top 10 reasons you should jump rope like you did in third grade -- besides the fact that it will make you feel like a kid again! Do it to warm up. Do it to cool down. Or make a whole workout of it. Just do it.
Jumping rope . . .

1. Burns up to 1,000 calories per hour. (Find out how many calories your other physical activities burn.)
2. Tones your entire body -- arms, legs, trunk, and back.
3. Is easy to learn (master’s degree in Pilates not required).
4. Improves your game, whether you golf, swim, ski, or play tennis.
5. Is totally cheap (ropes can start at $3.99) and portable (a 4-foot by 6-foot area is all you need).
6. Looks cool . . . check out those boxers at the gym who know what they’re doing.
7. Can be a solo or group workout.
8. Is gender neutral.
9. Is family friendly. Give your kids a rope, too!
10. Can be a blast. Make up some jump rope tricks, and have fun with it.

Post-It Reaction...

To Whom It May Concern,

This post is just the opinion of the viewer and it doesn't reflect the views of the persons involved herewith.(wink*)This isn't about being bias...this is just for laughs...I was just kind of witchy-feely right now to react on some of the irregularities that i've read from other blogsite(aside from the bloghost that i'm currently blogging on) a.k.a. i'm feeling kinda blograzzi right now.And...here goes,

1.If a person is in a so-called state: "numb senses" then therefore she shouldn't be feeling anything,right?And if it is said that she came to it,she should be thankful because she could therefore feel everything again...if she not,it means she is still NUMB,in other words...MANHID,okay?

2.Dense Paranoia you say?I don't really get it...since FYI i'm a slight BIPOLAR and i used to see a shrink and paranoia means you're so deep into something,you're so absorbed to it to the point of merging with it at some point that you couldn't figure out anymore which is which...And ONE thing is for sure....it ain't dense, baby.Because being dense means you're too shallow just to give too much fuss or a big deal out of it...And if a person is MABABAW,why would she deal with a thing and why would she be paranoid enough to keep thinking about it?

3.And if a person don't really care...a person won't tell the world about it that she don't care kasi WALA NGA SIYA PAKIALAM EH,di ba?So she shouldn't be telling that to the very person who initially reacted di ba...She should make it pass na lang as in DEADMA...

4.If a post is really pathetic,then why are you so interested to view it?And why are you really so into it...reading and reacting to it?If a person posted something and you don't care about it...DI WAG KANG MAGREACT!GAGAH! And if a person says something about another person whether it is good or bad,debasing,depreciating,mortifying or not...never react...UNLESS,TINATAMAAN KA...it only means if you reacted...it is then...so TRUE!(evil laugh*)

5. Never ever judge a person's richness by their house...you may be SO WRONG...THE PERSON COULD BE THAT RICH and you WOULDN'T KNOW unless you're part of their family...or their clan...

6. Pregnancy and other fetus stuff isn't something to hoax or joke about...it involves life and dignity and morality...and if it is lost....it automatically diminish a part in that person...(you know the drill...if you have sex you got pregnant...especially if you didn't use any birth control....

7. You are right, just like a crystal vase...or even a mirror..you could've fixed it back but the fissures are there...it could never be the same...KAYA NGA,why are you reacting to her blog...FYI: she just remembered her old life,old pain and everything...di ba?And isn't it that when you have been wounded...it will heal alright BUT...it'll leave you a scar...then, everytime you see the scar,you will superficially feel the pain again, and then you willl remember what caused the scar at the same time...WHen you have been hurt and you remembered it,you would eventually feel the hatred again...the feeling that you would wanna KILL,even if it's TEMPORARY only...IT'S LIKE THAT...parang CAESARIAN OPERATION...(been there,done that...hehehe!wink*wink*)

8. FYI: She never even tried winning him back in the first place.(a.k.a. SHe didn't even tried pickin' up a trash that she had thrown already...EEEEW!)YOU, i mean HE started this, and NOT her...Being delusional?I could see she's happier now than before... You’re not what you’re trying to think you are or let me correct it,if you don't mind...I think you might have misphrased it...SHE WASN'T WHAT YOU HAVE ALREADY THOUGHT SHE WAS!

P.S: …and just for laughs as well, who told her she's a princess?WELL, have you ever encountered these words: Her parents, those who loves her and then those who truly see her worth!NOW, have you got those words also?If she ain't a princess,are you one?

9. "YOU have no reputation to begin with..if you know what i mean... *grin*..." Well, what do you know...coming from a person who's so "clean?"HAve you got the right to tell that?Bakit?Are you God?Remember St. Magdalene's story...di nga sya hinusgahan ng God...YOU're just next...she's before you...don't ever say things like that...a man would never ever tell her next what he had been or how he really had been with his ex...what he had done or what he hadn't done...he could create a story so different from the truth and YOU'LL NEVER KNOW...

10. The person you're commenting might have been better or might not than who you are...ok...so this is just my opinion...i reacted on what you have written and not on you nor your personality as a whole...

So...that's it folks....thank's for reading!